Stop.Think. Breath.

I have sat in front of this screen for the last few days trying to write something. It's been a while since my last update. The problem was that I was not coming up with anything appropriate or even remotely positive. It's been a rough couple of weeks. Death of a friend - my exact age, kids sick, husband sick, unbelievable family drama, more sick kids. Needless to say it has been exhausting.

It's a New Year and so I am putting all of that behind me and making a fresh start!
I am looking forward to 2011 and all it has in store for us. We have some major milestones this year. Steve turns 40 (he is requesting NO PARTY.....ummmm ok) and Sam hits double digits! Steven makes his 1st communion this May. We have a great vacation planned even though there is sand involved. I am surprising Bella for her birthday with a trip to Disney and taking Sophia and Anthony along with my mom for their 1st trip to Disney. We are off to the Rocking Horse Ranch for the 1st time for Steven's birthday. It's gonna be a fun year!!!

I try to make resolutions - making them is cake keeping them is the job. I do have a few though and I am hoping that writing them will help to hold me accountable for them:

I want to learn to cook more and better. It's really the one thing I loathe. Honestly I only hate cooking cause I get to intimidated in the kitchen. I can follow any recipe as long as it's in front of me and written down - oh a picture of the end result would be nice too.

I want to be more "present in the moment" with the kids. We are running and running and I need us to slow down a bit. Not to mention that our schedules are to the point now that unless Sam starts driving it will be impossible to get everyone everywhere. She can totally reach the pedal.

I want to start running again - I miss it and the lack of time I have is a problem but I will figure something out. Plus I need to be in a bathing suit by April and I already bought them in the size I want to be and removed the tags so they can't be returned. So they MUST fit!

I need to learn how to use my camera and photo programs better. I have classes lined up for later this month so I am 1/2 way to keeping this 1 resolution. Wooohooo

Finally last but not least and probably the most important one - come hell or high water this will be a drama free year. I don't mean "oh my god the kid fell down the stairs and broke his arm" drama. I mean the " I'm mad at you cause you looked at me funny and I think you were thinking of something not nice to say" drama. You know the bullshit drama. I have had my fill. Met my quota. A not so new friend said to me today "Look at your life - it's a good one ". She's right it is good - actually pretty perfect as far as I am concerned and I am not going to waste any more time or energy on the negative that isn't mine to begin with. It takes more time and energy to be mad and sad then it does to just be happy so why wouldn't you want to just be happy. So cranky is out and Happy is in for 2011. Sweet!

I have lots of pictures to put up and will get on that soon. I am just a bit busy at the moment tending to the ill and weary of the house. Anthony is breathing like crap and we are trying to avoid a hospital stay. Steve is recovering from a little surgery to help solve his breathing problems. So let me get these 2 back on their feet and I will get back to this.

Oh and remember to Stop. Think. Breath.

For Samantha, Steven, Isabella, Sophia & Anthony

My true originals! I love you!

Rest in Peace Elizabeth Edwards

Elizabeth Edwards last well written facebook post:

“You all know that I have been sustained throughout my life by three saving graces — my family, my friends, and a faith in the power of resilience and hope. These graces have carried me through difficult times and they have brought more joy to the good times than I ever could have imagined.

“The days of our lives, for all of us, are numbered. We know that. And, yes, there are certainly times when we aren't able to muster as much strength and patience as we would like. It’s called being human. But I have found that in the simple act of living with hope, and in the daily effort to have a positive impact in the world, the days I do have are made all the more meaningful and precious. And for that I am grateful.

I was very sad to hear of the passing of this woman. I had followed her since she was first diagnosed with cancer in 2004. With everything she was going through and having to live through her husband's infidelity it is very sad to hear of her passing this morning. She has 3 children. A daughter who is 28 and 12 and a son who is 10. I can only imagine what they must be going through tonight. So very very sad.